My Kingdom for Ketchup

Yes, that's my brother.  Yes, this really happened, just yesterday in fact.  No, I still can't comprehend this.  Congratulations, bro.  You just took lazy to a whole new level.  Although he did go to the effort of cooking the corndog first instead of just eating it straight out of the freezer, so I guess we have to give him a few points there. 
But not too many, as upon reading this he'll probably take that as a challenge. 

High School Lesson #0848

Examples of chaos-inducing science projects include the following: 
Those containing live animals (they’ll escape) or dead animals (yuck), involving acid (yes, including LSD), are toxic (yes, including cafeteria lunches), are highly flammable (remember Murphy’s Law), move on their own, think for themselves, are explosive (this had better not come as a surprise to you), resemble anything from the Tower of London (or the orthodontist’s office), or are larger than an average refrigerator.

While shouting “I destroyed my high school -FOR SCIENCE!” at the top of your lungs is rather intimidating, in most cases it also looks bad on a résumé.   Take note.

Frost Bite

And if it gets cold enough, then your nice, swishy cape will become as stiff as a board and shatter if you try to move.  Not so great for stalking your victims. 

Of course, your victims probably won't be dumb enough to stay outside at 12 below anyway. 


Now, the real question is, can a vampire get frost bite?

Freezer Jenga

 

While at school, I generally share an apartment with five other girls.  I have learned from experience that when six girls with uncoordinated grocery lists share a fridge, the refrigerator becomes an overstuffed, chaotic, demonic entity that will devour anything left in it for more than 48 hours.  You won't see your carrots again.  And if you do find them, well, by that time they won't be fit for anything other than fungal consumption. 
There are three courses of action that can be taken in such a situation:  A) find an alternate means of keeping your food cold (living in Alaska helps), B) give up and survive on peanut butter, or C) give up and brave the fridge. 

Should you pick C, I humbly suggest a few items that may come in handy: 
-Duct tape and possibly a padlock to secure all items you want to keep track of
-A helmet, shield, ice ax, and extra pair of hands for when you want to dig something out of the freezer
-Steel wool, antiseptic, and a spade for cleaning it out at the end of the semester (Seriously.  At the end of last semester, our freezer had caramel-colored stalactites hanging from the ceiling.  Don't know why, don't want to know why.)
-The Ghost Busters (it couldn't hurt)

Onward, my brave soldiers! 
To the fridge!

Happy January!

As per a request, I'll be posting one of my Birthstone Unicorns pictures here each month this year (although you can see them all on deviantArt, but whatever).  I've also added a button linking to my deviantArt account to the sidebar, in case anyone feels like checking that out.  So here's my picture for January.  Happy New Year, everyone!