Friday, September 16, 2022

Five Elements

Wizard:  With the magic of this crystal, you will each be given the power of one of the five elements! Wind!  Water!  Fire!  Smoke!  Mold!   Kid:  Wait, classical elements, or elements of house damage? Wizard:  No comment.

There's many potential ways that home repair can inspire feats of wizardry.  This is one of the less conventional ones. 

Friday, September 2, 2022

Glazed Over

A unicorn has a bunch of donuts on his horn, with more being added.   "After careful reflection, it occurs to me that this was a terrible idea."


Never put yourself in a situation where you could end up with sprinkles in your eye.  

So...  any volunteers to eat the one on the bottom of the stack? 

Friday, August 26, 2022

Friday, August 19, 2022

Rapunzel's Brother

Rapunzel's brother has the world's longest beard.  "You know, I actually envy girls."

Gimme a head with hair
Long, beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming
Streaming, flaxen, waxen

Give me down to there
Shoulder length or longer
Here baby, there mama
Everywhere daddy daddy

Hair, hair, hair, hair
Grow it, show it
Long as I can grow it
My hair

Friday, August 12, 2022

Friday, August 5, 2022

Jinn Jinx

Person:  So, I assume that I can't wish for more wishes?  Genie:  Actually, you can.  Person:  Really?  Genie:  But I automatically assume all further wishes to be to have a sea urchin lodged up your nose.  Person:  ...Oh.

Wake up, grant wishes, mess with people who try to outsmart the system.