He may be self-aware, but he's still a step behind.
From what I understand, the thing with Santa giving coal out to naughty children originated simply as a matter of convenience: Santa fills stockings over the fireplace with goodies, and comes to one belonging to a poorly-behaved individual. What to give them? Oh, is that a coal bin by the fireplace? Yeah, that'll do. These days he's probably more likely to use some old corn chips he fished out from between the couch cushions. Exceptions might be made for notorious repeat offenders. Those require something... special.
If you're wondering about Webern (that's "Vay-burn"), he's a composer who specialized in atonal and twelve-tone "music." Generally only music majors ever hear of him, and of those only about 1.2% actually like his work (and this is a generous estimate).
