Friday, October 28, 2011

Sugar Apocalypse

Father gears up with supplies, pillow armor, and a cushion fort  Pepper spray, check  Celery, check  Fort, check  Armor, check  Bring it on  His wife comes in with their children, high on sugar after Trick-or-Treating  We're home, Honey

Zombies are nothing compared to a typical child after Trick-or-Treating. 
Yes that's a sofa cushion fort. 
No, I don't think it's going to be enough. 

Happy Halloween!

Saturday, October 22, 2011

New Arrivals, Old Rivals

Anubis talks to a spirit: You must be one of the new arrivals  I'm Anubis  I'm in charge of this section of the Underworld  Osiris: Excuse me, but I'm in charge here  Anubis: Hey, I was here long before you ever showed up  Osiris: That doesn't make you the better one  Anubis: I put you together, and I can take you apart  Osiris: I'd like to see you try, dog-breath  They fight, while the spirit ignores them and watches TV
The problem with a culture having a lot of gods is that you have almost inevitably have some whose duties overlap.  And then this happens.  Ouch. 

For those unfamiliar with Egyptian Mythology, this is Anubis and Osiris, which ironically is their Greek names.  They were originally called Inpu and Asar, or something like that.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Hades' Lament

Hades: It's not fair  Anubis: Here we go again  Hades: I mean, you're  lord of the Underworld, and no one ever gave you a hard time  It's Set who's the bad guy  And people are busy worrying about Loki, so they never bother Hel either  Hel plays cards with Sedna and the Grim Reaper: Hey, you get a planetoid named after you  Don't complain  Hades: I'm not even the one who goes around collecting souls  That's Thanatos' job  Hel: Speaking of which, where is he  Freya: Went to pick up a movie  La Calavera Catrina: Oh, stop taking it so personally  Humans are just lazy and like shortcuts for instant bad guys  Hades: If you say so  It's just that there are hundreds of Greek monsters and bad-tempered gods to choose from instead, so why am I always the bad guy  Thanatos walks in holding a DVD: Hey, guys  I just picked up the remake of Clash of the Titans  Hades screams  Sedna: You just had to do that  Thanatos: Heh  Oops  Freya phone calls: Hey Persephone, could you come pick up your husband  Please
 
The problem with being a god of death is that you're an easy target for bad guy status. 
The problem with being immortal is that all your friends have heard your complaints already. 

Featured here are Hades/Pluto, Anubis, Freya, Hel, The Grim Reaper, Sedna, La Calavera Catrina, and Thanatos.  I thought about adding a few more, but not today.  I need sleep.

P.S.  Yes, that movie was dreadful.  Spiffy new CGI graphics does not a good movie make. 
Plus they screwed up the Greek myths.  Again.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Death and Hel

Grim Reaper appears to man in bed: Hi, Eddie  Eddie: Gah  You're the Grim Reaper  Grim: Brilliant surmise  Let's go  Eddie: No, please  I'm not ready  Grim: That's what they all say  Eddie: You can't take me yet  Who will take care of my Chia Pet collection, or count all the tiles on the kitchen ceiling, or polish my prize lint collection, or take my slinky for a walk, or brush me  Grim sighs  Hel: Hey, there  Grim: Oh  Hi, Hel  What are you doing here  Eddie: Think of the slinky  My poor beloved slinky  How on earth can you be so cruel  She can't survive a day without me  Who will take care of her  Oh precious slinky, no one can love you like I do  Hel: Things are a little slow at my place  What about you  Eddie: There must be a way to get you to give me more time  Um, I can give you my entire collection of exotic jelly beans  I know  I can cook for you for a month  No  A year  Please, please, please, please, please  Grim: The ususal  Hel: I see  Eddie: I won't do it  I won't go into the light  You can't make me  Well, I guess you could, but you seem like a reasonable guy  Can't we work this out  We could settle this over a game of Candy Land  Or Monopoly  All I ever wanted to do was learn how to play the kazoo  I swear I'll  Hel freezes him  Grim: I wish you'd stop doing that  Hel: It shut him up, didn't it

It's October, as in the month of Halloween.  Since I already do Halloween-esque cartoons during most of the year (such as ones involving vampires), I thought I'd do something a little different this month.  So for the next few weeks, you get to see what happens when the embodiments of Death from different cultures run into each other.  And if I somehow offend someone by doing this, then I'll apologize in advance. 

Here we have the Grim Reaper, of course,  and Hel (yes, that's her name), the Norse goddess of the underworld, which in this mythology is basically an ice cave.  She enjoys turning her underlings into popsicles.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Giraffe Riders

Giraffe Riders in the Sky

There's a lesson to be learned from this:  never draw cartoons when sleep-deprived.  Everything will seem funny.