Dilettante Comics: January 2020

Friday, January 31, 2020

Funky Safari

Anni and Andrew return home and find Cory Ander is in their apartment. Cory: Greetings! Andrew (quietly): Who let him in? Anni: I didn't invite him. Cory: I've come to assist in the expedition! Andrew: ...what? Cory: There are fantastic wonders to be found in these bureau drawers! He opens a lower drawer, accidentally unleashing a cloud of bats, and runs from them screaming. Cory: Get them off! Get them off! Andrew: I was expecting him to make a "burro drawer" joke. Disappointing. Anni: I'll clean this mess, but I'll need masking tape, a plunger, and a tape recorder.

Any excuse to wear a pith helmet.

Meet Cory Ander, a cartoon fallow deer buck and the second of Anni Seed's three "cousins." If Anni is the problem-solver of the group, Cory is the explorer (and a prominent reason why Anni has problems to solve).

Friday, January 24, 2020

The Science Project's Revenge

There have been many instances of science providing a good excuse for revenge. There have also been many instances of the science experiments turning against the scientist. Just glance over a random 1950's sci-fi movie and you'll probably find a plot built around that.

Isn't it great that little Mindy learned this so early in her career? I'm sure she'll grow up to be a great mad scientist!

Friday, January 17, 2020

Sister Humphry's Last Talk

Counselor: We thank those who helped pass the Sacrament. Our first speaker- A woman wearing a bathrobe and hair towel shuffles up. I wasn't finished. I... what? Sis Humphry: My talk is on Good Works. Good works is good. It's in the title. See? holds up posterboard with 'good works' emblazoned on it and waves hand over the first word Good. For those of you who can't see, that's G-O-O-D. Good works are good because of the goodness of gooditude that is good. And God wants us to be good. Because He said so. So be good. Don't kick puppies. Don't hit babies. Amen. She shuffles away from the podium. Meanwhile, the counselor's jaw drops, while the Bishop sits in horror and the other counselor has a forced, broken grin.

Cue one fainting bishop in three, two...

In a denomination without paid clergy, the congregation is expected to pick up some of the slack. Normally this isn't a problem, but every now and then you get a Sunday speaker who is... of lesser quality. This ranges from the ones who can't read their own notes, to the ones who go on wild tangents, to the ones who describe at length bizarre metaphors that make the bishop squirm. To date, I've never heard tales of any quite as blatantly bad as this one. I pray it stays that way.

Friday, January 10, 2020

Stop! In the Name of Blood

Vampire Night School is in session. Teacher: Everyone should have a copy of this semester's syllabus. Please note the dates of the exams- Student (reading): "Must demonstrate ability to distinguish between victim and stop sign pole." Are you seriously testing us on that? Teacher: Yes. My nephew failed, so it was deemed necessary. Student: You're kidding. Teacher (holding up photo proof): I am not.

The new lowest standard has been set.

Just to be clear, I wrote the script for this comic before I came up with the title.

Friday, January 3, 2020

High School Lesson #9081

Heck hath no fury like a crowd of frozen gym students.

It gets colder in Minnesota, but one hopes no one would be that stupid...