Wonderglobe

Magic is everywhere.  You just have to open your eyes. 

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Creep

The Christmas Creep is a supervillian, and he aims to make us sick of Christmas by pushing merchandising to the extremes.  Normally I'd say to eliminate with extreme prejudice, but I'm not sure that's really in the Christmas spirit either. 

Note:  Yes, this week's comic is far from being called complete (between how many characters are involved and real-world stresses, this is semi-justifiable).  But I figured it's at least in a complete-enough stage that everyone can still get the joke, so today you get a behind-the-scenes look at how these things are put together.  I promise I'll finish the lineart and coloring ...eventually. 

EDIT:  I finally finished it!  It only took, what, an extra month or so?  Anyway, I figured this was historic enough (even if not in all the right ways) that I'm keeping the original sketch around for posterity.  (click to enlarge)

A Light Amount

How many lights?  More than should be physically possible to fit on any tree. 

Anni Seed returns, this time joined by her cousin Pepper Mint, who's visiting for the holidays (yes, she's a reindeer).  And you thought living with one reality-warping cartoon deer was insane enough. 

Cats in the Christmas Tree

You could also try decorating the cat, if you're bored and feel like thumbing your nose at PETA. 

Certified Fresh Turkey

 

Thanksgiving is a time for family.  Unless, of course, your family is like this.  Then you can't be blamed for making a break for it at the first opportunity. 

The day after Thanksgiving on the first year I ran this blog, I posted a comic that unintentionally became the beginning of the saga of Steve and Mel.  I figured it's only fitting to pay tribute to it. 

Note:  You'll notice that this image is significantly lacking in the color department.  This will be corrected sometime in the hopefully near future, or at least before it's time for the next post.  In the meantime, I'll get some sleep and hopefully regain the capacity to think. 

EDIT:  Color capacity is now at 100%, and only a week late.  Um, this is a Thanksgiving comic, so we can all just be thankful about the color being here and just ignore how long it took, right?

The Week Before Thanksgiving

To the brave workers everywhere who sacrifice their patience, sanity, and stomachs so that the rest of us may partake of poultry goodness on Thanksgiving Day:  We applaud you. 

(Un)lucky Kitty

Must be Friday the 13th.  How about that?

Vampire Anteater

Close encounters with wildlife?  Yes.  Danger and intrigue?  Yes.  Unscheduled trips to the emergency room?  Yes.  You'd think the patrons would take those liability waivers a little more seriously by now, especially after the rabbit revolt. 

The Scariest Costume

 

What scares the gods of death?  This. 

Left to right: Sedna, Osiris, Thanatos, Anubis, La Calvera Catrina, Freya, Hel, Hades, and Persephone. 

Happy Halloween!

Grim Defeats

Don't fear the Reaper.  ...unless, of course, you challenge him.  Then you're just asking for it. 

Who Woke the Dead?

 

How to put your job as a Deity of Death in serious jeopardy: step one. 

This week features Sedna, the Grim Reaper, Hades, La Calavera Catrina, Anubis, and last but not least, Thanatos, who has a certain reputation. 

It's a Small Underworld

Condemned for murder?  Huh.  Chained to a rock until the end of the world?  Meh.  Viper constantly dripping poison on your face?  Whatever.  Being forced to listen to your offspring sing sappy songs?  Now that's cruel and unusual.  Don't worry.  Loki had it coming. 
At least they're not singing "Kumbaya."  This time. 

It's October, which means that we once again commence with the annual Deities of Death Fest, this time in a Nordic fashion.  Starring Hel with her brothers Jormungand and Fenris and her estranged father, Loki. 

Things to Run Away From

Why first impressions are very, very important.  The correct one could save someone's life.  Or at least their sanity. 

Note:  Colors will be forthcoming, and will be accompanied by the traditional "the artist needs sleep" excuse. 

EDIT:  Color now!  You are required by law to admire it. 

Out of My Mind

...I'll give you a call when I get back. 

Contraflow Carols

As we bid farewell to the final official days of summer, let us pause to remember our fond memories of the annual road construction season and the long hours we waited to inch our cars three feet forward.  May these warm memories comfort us in the coming cold months as we wait for someone to pull over and help push our cars out of the snowdrifts. 

High School Lesson #5001

At least NRMS has the decency to not try to hide the fact. 

Hang in There!

Only horrific death and dismemberment await you if you don't.  No pressure. 

When there's a gojirasaurus coming at you with a buzzsaw, you know you're in trouble. 

Killer Ponies

Don't tell me little kids aren't like this.  I know little kids.  I know what they're like.

Access Denied

Nature has a few ways, in varying degrees, of letting you know when it's time to head back to civilization.  Most of them aren't things you want in your face first thing in the morning. 
2,000 pounds of bisonian death is just one of them. 

Inconsistency

The second panel is the reason why I don't complain about rainstorms.  "Good" weather is relative. 

The Vampire Mom

So very helpful. 

The Awkward

You know the part.  The hero (or his socially-impaired sidekick) says or does something that everyone else - in and out of universe - knows is stupid and embarrassing, but can't do anything to stop and are therefore forced to cover their eyes and wait out.  The official term for this is "cringe comedy."  Emphasis on "cringe." 

Meow Mixed

Therapy and emotional counseling will probably be needed, although we're not yet certain if it's for the cat or for the kid. 

Rainbow Apocalypse

 

And thus was the cradle of humanity destroyed by a burst of sugar and color.  And it was glorious. 

Now I can justify eating sprinkle-laden ice cream as protecting mankind from destruction. 

Super Vampire!

Having a pearly-white heroic smile doesn't have quite the same effect when your skin is almost just as pale. 

So what kind of powers does a super vampire have, anyway?  Super speed?  Super stealth?
Super slurping? 

Carrots Work

 

Anni Seed returns, this time risking getting arrested by the reality police for using vegetables in ways not intended by nature.  Oh well.  At least the result is pretty and festive. 

To my fellow Americans, Happy Independence Day!  To everyone else who might be reading this, make up an excuse, grab some fireworks, and light them off.  Because fireworks!

Butterfly Graffiti

Otherwise known as "how to seriously mess with butterfly collectors." 

At one point a photographer managed to hunt down patterns in butterfly wings resembling not only the entire alphabet, but all the numbers 0-9.  Needless to say, this sort of thing wasn't included. 

The Humanity Percentage

 

Technically human?  Yes.  Great personality?  Yes.  Common interests?  Yes.  Alive?  Well... 

Having absolutely no life outside of trying to kill your roommate can have unforeseen consequences. 


Note:  Am tired.  Will add color when not tired, or at least conscious.  Sorry. 

EDIT:  Now there is color, and it is glorious.  Glorious, I say!

Bibliohazard

When the mere sight of you gives the librarian a migraine...
When entire bookshelves are left desolate in your wake...
When simply carrying around your books grants you superhuman strength...
...Then you may want to start re-assessing your life. 

Six Minutes to Summer

 

I'm not sure I want to know what kind of ritual they do for the school bus. 

Two Pairs of Fangs

The vampire is the more evil, mysterious-looking one. 
...yeah, I can't tell the difference either. 

Granted, they'll both kill you anyway, but if you're insistent on surviving it's useful to know if you'll need an anti-venom or a blood transfusion. 

Coconutty

Oh look.  It's raining nuclear fallout and coconut milk.  Fancy that. 

One semester while in college, a pair of my roommates bought themselves a coconut, only to realize a little too late that they had no idea how to get the thing open.  Thus, they resorted to hacking at it repeatedly with a variety of knives.  About an hour and a few tons of shrapnel scattered across the kitchen table later, they finally succeeded.  Unfortunately after all that, they discovered that this particular coconut didn't taste very good.  Though having its insides tainted with the aforementioned shrapnel probably didn't help.  The leftover pieces proceeded to languish in the refrigerator for a few weeks, with the rest of us not daring to touch them, as the roommates in question were known to be both violent and rather possessive of their foodstuffs.  After a while, the coconut disappeared, never to be seen again.  The fridge probably ate it. 

Almost Ready

 

This is only untrue in that the kid's room is unrealistically clean. 

Entry: Disaster Area

The universe has ways of letting you know when it's time to clean your room. 


Other signs include:
-You discover Bigfoot has been hiding in your room for years.
-Your unwashed clothing has achieved sentience.
-The smell of your room has deafened people.

Drink Blood!!!

It's great for your health!!! 

...just not so great for everyone else's. 

Others Have Goats

I figure that goats happened when God decided to mix puppies and deer together.  The result was a species of adorable, devious critters that are nearly as efficient as wrecking balls, can exploit even the tiniest holes in their enclosure, and will happily ingest anything remotely vegetable in origin.  The good news is that all of this makes the excuse "the goat ate my homework" surprisingly plausible. 


For the record, most cats I know would try to eat the string too. 

We Have Priorities

Ah, one of the joys of apartment living. 

Though given their track record, they're still probably not getting their deposits back. 

Prickly

 

Alternate title:  "Cuddle Hazard."  True love knows no prickles. 


Fun fact #1:  A group of hedgehogs is called an array or prickle. 

Fun fact #2:  I just discovered that my home state will allow African Pygmy hedgehogs as pets, but not European hedgehogs.  Weird stuff. 

Poodles in Space!

Why? 

Why not!

Monster Mash

The monster under the bed is going to need a new job.  After he's released from the hospital, that is. 

Dorm-Cleaning Theater

Arm yourselves with bleach and steel wool, soldiers.  It's going to be a long war. 

Twenty Swords, Zero Sanity

Are fencers really this nuts?  Yes. 

Before anyone asks, "zombie broadsword" is a game of sorts attributed to my brother and a group of other freshman fencers, in which each player takes a PVC pipe-and-foam sword and hacks at the others until their arms fall off either figuratively or literally.  I'm pretty sure it won't be showing up at the Olympics anytime soon. 

The scary thing is that this isn't the weirdest thing that happened in my high school fencing club. 

High School Lesson #7863

No, really.  The structure for the twelve-bar blues is so straightforward that it can be easily adapted for literally any situation.  Here's how:

1.  Write a line describing the situation.
2.  Repeat it.
3.  Write a rhyming line that completes the thought.
4.  Sing the whole thing to these chords:  I-I-I-I / IV-IV-I-I / V-IV-I-I.
5.  Done! 

...So, as an example:
I'm sitting at a laptop, writing posts for my website,
I say, I'm sitting at a laptop, writing posts for my website.
If I get it done, maybe I'll finally get some sleep tonight.

Now, go sing some blues, people!  

Do Not Enter

Some doors are best left unopened. 

Before anyone worries about my sanity, I'm drew this not so much because I'm having a mental breakdown, but because I might have one if I make myself do anything better than a minimally detailed cartoon right now.  I've been a little busy, so this is the best I could throw together in half an hour.  (But we've all had days weeks like that, right?)

Perfectly Logical

I suppose this is a fairly good policy for facing the many, many insanities the universe has to offer.  Especially the ones that potentially make even less sense with context. 

Let Them Slay Cakes

A match made in heaven.  Maybe. 

I figured I ought to do something vaguely Valentine's-y, so here's something inspired by the many, many wedding cake mishaps that find their way onto Cake Wrecks.  I'm pretty sure this is an acceptable response to winding up with such a cake.  Or, at least my lawyer hasn't said otherwise.  She's covering her ears and making "la-la-la" noises right now, so I think that means I'm okay. 


NOTE:  Colors are forthcoming, and will arrive as soon as I recover from whatever I'm sick with this time.  My apologies for the inconvenience.  Now, collapsing in 3, 2, 1.... 

EDIT:  Color, glorious color!!!  And yes, I made the cake red velvet.  I figured that a cake with red insides would make the mandatory mauling even more spectacular.  Wait.  I think that came out wrong.  Um... made the dis-assemblage even more colorful?  Maybe I should go back to bed. 

Tasty, Tasty Blood

Historically, chocolate syrup was used in black-and-white films as fake blood, including in movies like Psycho.   I like to believe that the cast and crew members abused this for all it was worth. 

High School Lesson #0006

There is a time and a place to show off your mad ball-chasing skills.  This isn't it. 

Same Old Story

It shall never end.  Never. 

The Exploitation of Physics

...Cartoon physics, that is.  Rule #1: You can walk across thin air as long as you don't see yourself doing it. 

Anni Seed is a cartoon deer I created after binge-watching vintage Disney cartoons.  In-universe, she's a 1920's cartoon character that through a series of bizarre circumstances was brought to life and now hangs out with her animator's descendant.  And as you've probably noticed, she has no problem with exploiting the Rules of Funny for all they're worth. 

(And don't worry about her friend - according to the Rules of Funny, it wouldn't be funny if he got hurt.)

Ninja Dachshund

He fights using "sai-sages."  And yes, I made this cartoon just so I could use that pun. 

12 Days of Fright

But all it wanted was love and cuddles!

I figured that at least some of you would want to see how this resolved.  You're welcome! 

Yes, I know this is technically a Christmas post and that it's January, but since the twelve days of Christmas go through to January 6th, I figured I could bend the rules.  This is the last one of the season, I promise.